A Murder Scene
After taking a monumental dump… I had grave fears for my rump. Inside the bowl it was far from clean. …
Pure Pooetry
There’s a Goblin in My Loo
There’s a goblin in my loo. He devours all the poo. But he’s quite a nice chap. Never gives a …
Pure Pooetry
Christening The Crapper
You may not believe this story that I tell… Because you did not witness the horrific smell. But trust me …
Pure Pooetry
The Secret of Clean
What’s the best way to get the bowl clean? What’s the secret for a shiny gleam? There’s a method known …
Pure Pooetry
Stubborn Brown Chunks
A big blast of urine was not enough. To substitute the power of the flush. Clinging to the bowl’s inner …
Pure Pooetry
Dirty Business
What happened to those things that make blue water? My porcelain struggles with this brown slaughter. I remember once things …
Pure Pooetry
The Horrible Mud Hog
I’m out on a stroll, walking my dog. Feeling pretty good, I have a little jog. The sun is out, …
Pure Pooetry
Poo Can’t Touch This
As I was wiping I felt something warm. I hoped like hell the paper wasn’t torn. Thin and whispy is …
Pure Pooetry
Threat of Slime
Dangerously I was asleep at the wheel. But was awakened by a fart I did peel. And luckily it happened …
Pure Pooetry
Ex-Meat Sauce
My porcelain throne is empty like the streets. Until now my ass had issued a retreat! This shiny bowl, oh …
Pure Pooetry
Did Someone Say Panic?
I ask you, what the heck is going on? The toilet paper was flowing 20 miles long! Now there isn’t …
Pure Pooetry
Top Deck Surprise
You take a dump as you normally would. But there’s a scent of something not so good. You checked and …
Pure Pooetry
The Grim Reeker
Laying in wait for the perfect chance… To give you a surprise in your underpants. This ghastly being is known …
Pure Pooetry
My Pootaters Are Boiled
It really boils my pootaters… When a throne gets defiled by a poo-hater. They don’t think to clean up their …
Pure Pooetry
Like Clockwork
I shit once a day to keep my colon clean. I’m quite regular if you know what I mean. I …
Pure Pooetry
Brown Graffiti
Monday morn, the dunnies are nice and clean. The porcelain is so shiny it even gleams. I must congratulate the …
Pure Pooetry
The Throne of Management
I’ve just discovered the manager’s throne! Such a wonderous facility I’ve never known! There is no comparison, this throne is …
Pure Pooetry
Brown Lantern
I’m sorry to bring you such terrible news. But I just delivered the most heinous of poos. The stench was …
Pure Pooetry
