Stand To Attention
Women complain we often miss.Yet I never felt Posideon’s Kiss. Cos I’m a dead shot, a winning bullseye. I’m a hole …
Pure Pooetry
Pure Pooetry
Fuelling The Fatberg
The sewers beneath old London town… Conceal a secret coated in brown. The tubes and pipes that lead to dunnies… …
Pure Pooetry
Drop The Brown Anchor Me Farties!
A jolly good scrubbing was in order… After I polluted the lower deck water. The whole damn crew would grin …
Pure Pooetry
Tailpipe Troubles
I’ve got a brown log stuck in the tailpipe. I can’t remove it, even with a wipe. It only pushed …
Pure Pooetry
Rumpty Dumpty
I’m Rumpty Dumpty, I’ve got a big head. And I just decided to drop a brown egg! From my high …
Pure Pooetry
Oh The Covidity!
I just released a covid whopper. A highly contagious stinking plopper. On fast food and coffee is where it grows. …
Pure Pooetry
The Price of Pooping
Why are dunny rolls suddenly worth a bundle? I just need something soft against my grundle. On eBay I saw …
Pure Pooetry
Slow Brown Hurl
I’m taking the first dump at work for the new year. This one’s a slow release as it inches out …
Pure Pooetry
Brown Smoothie
Dude, I just took the biggest deuce of my life. It’s so goddamn big my anus is in strife. I …
Pure Pooetry
Uncorking The Nugget
There once was a time when pooetry was easy. I’d just planted my cheeks and the rhymes came sleazy. But …
Pure Pooetry
What Goes Up Must Come Down
The wait was long but I found relief. I was finally able to plant my cheeks. The turd was brewing …
Pure Pooetry
At This Moment
At this moment on the toilet, I sit. I grunt and I groan, having a shit fit. Finally the nugget …
Pure Pooetry
Number Two: Part 2
A second poop in such quick succession. The number two must be an obsession. Nah, this is just a silly …
Pure Pooetry
Buy Our Book!
Six months ago a release came from within. Yeah, our book may be small and thin… But it’s filled with …
Pure Pooetry
Poo Ohm Bomb
I am the Zen master of taking dumps. Each nugget splashes in with a thump. I centre my being and …
Pure Pooetry
Spikey Little Nugget
This spikey little nugget, on the cusp of it’s debut… Instead of an outing, it’s a stubborn steadfast poo! I’ll …
Pure Pooetry
Ancient Ass Unloading
It feels like I haven’t taken a shit in ages. This pooem may take up many pages. In fact, I …
Pure Pooetry
