No Pain, No Poop
Here’s a story of the most heinous of shites. A mighty bog battle, the worst of all fights. I had …
Pure Pooetry
Minding My Own Business
Here I am minding my own business… When my bowels think it’s Christmas. What’s happening? Is it a party or …
Pure Pooetry
Big Ol’ Bog!
I sit here on the loo and I ponder… This horrid scent, now I wonder… What on Earth did I …
Pure Pooetry
The Places You’ll Go!
Where our precious butts take rest. To perform the duty we like best. Should be pillowed and comfy. And never …
Pure Pooetry
An Unpleasant Outing
I just had an unpleasant outing. Of some sickening sauerkrauting. Allow me take you back to the start. As usual it …
Pure Pooetry
There’s a Goblin in My Loo
There’s a goblin in my loo. He devours all the poo. But he’s quite a nice chap. Never gives a …
Pure Pooetry
Fecal Freckles
If your throne is peppered with brown specks… You failed your duty of the loo respect. If a reckless rectal …
Pure Pooetry
Pure Pooetry
Poopare For War
In times of peace, you must poopare for war. So that is why I’m shittin’ on the floor! I’m not …
Pure Pooetry
Plunging To Death
I swear this plane just hit some rough turbulence… Just as I blasted away some lengthy flatulence. I’m miles above …
Pure Pooetry
The Golden Throne
We all know the feeling of brown overflow… It’s a surging torrent that is raring to go. The levy will …
Pure Pooetry
Heavy Shattin’
It seems like an age since we’ve written. But I can assure you we’re still shittin’. In fact, a wafting …
Pure Pooetry
Christening The Crapper
You may not believe this story that I tell… Because you did not witness the horrific smell. But trust me …
Pure Pooetry
Caffeine Volcano
I love drinking coffee, oh yes I do. The only problem is the monstrous poo. After a few cups of …
Pure Pooetry
Quiet Time
Can’t a guy get some peace and quiet? Pooping in silence..have you ever tried it? I go to the loo …
Pure Pooetry
The Magic Poorridge Pot
My loo is shattered and gross. It’s certainly nothing I would boast. Yet busting to go I had little choice. …
Pure Pooetry
A Dead Man’s Doo
The dead man’s doo, sat at the bottom of the loo. It had been lying there for a week or …
Pure Pooetry
Fuelling The Fatberg
The sewers beneath old London town… Conceal a secret coated in brown. The tubes and pipes that lead to dunnies… …
Pure Pooetry
