Meteorite Madness: Part 1
Last night what I shat left me floored. I think it was a brown alien horde. Or maybe a comet, …
Pure Pooetry
Bangers and Mush
I just released some Bangers and Mush. Promptly following I pressed the flush! That was a real banger, I promise …
Pure Pooetry
Half Flush or Full?: Redux
Do you press the half flush or full? It depends if the stink is nasty and cruel. Cos if that …
Pure Pooetry
Fuelling The Fatberg
The sewers beneath old London town… Conceal a secret coated in brown. The tubes and pipes that lead to dunnies… …
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Not a Friend
Bowels are loaded, bowels are primed. It’s time to unleash an ounce of slime! It comes out thick, it comes …
Pure Pooetry
Angry Rear Crater
Last night’s meal was a meaty feast. Foolishly I had fueled an inner beast. By morning my southern regions were …
Pure Pooetry
Three Flushes
A violent inner spasm… Came from my rear chasm. Followed by a tummy rumble. Bellowing an angry grumble. Dinner was …
Pure Pooetry
Scrub-a-Doo-Doo
Just now I used the toilet brush. I had to expunge a skid of mush. Left there by my own …
Pure Pooetry
Don’t Let The Bed Sludge Bite
The idea to have dinner late at night… Wasn’t a good one when it was time to shite. I had …
Pure Pooetry
Fecal Funeral
My nostril twitched at something unusual… It was the hideous stench of a fecal funeral. I had casually strolled out …
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Deploying The Goops
Marching into the bathroom, delivering the brown gloom, I pull the ripcord on my pants. In my hand the loose …
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Smells So Familiar
Here I stand, taking a big ol’ whiz. Then the smell hits me, there it is. This wee stinks of …
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Snags Kablamo
I could feel within a furious brown. Kicking and screaming before it crowned. Without hesitation, I left the bay. To …
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Shades of Brown
I’m gonna haveta sign up to one of these gyms. I’m not dropping enough solid Slim Jims. I’ve been told …
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Chocolate Factory
It took a while, but the factory is finally open. The chocolate factory that is, and the gate is broken. …
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Moby Thick
My legs grow numb as I pen this tale. For I’m on the John as I excrete this whale. It’s …
Pure Pooetry
