No Pain, No Poop
Here’s a story of the most heinous of shites. A mighty bog battle, the worst of all fights. I had …
Pure Pooetry
Fecal Freckles
If your throne is peppered with brown specks… You failed your duty of the loo respect. If a reckless rectal …
Pure Pooetry
The Brown Gherkin
A sudden pain in the guts was the first warning. Then a trumpet announced a bog was spawning. Out it spewed …
Pure Pooetry
Christening The Crapper
You may not believe this story that I tell… Because you did not witness the horrific smell. But trust me …
Pure Pooetry
Not a Friend
Bowels are loaded, bowels are primed. It’s time to unleash an ounce of slime! It comes out thick, it comes …
Pure Pooetry
The Double Handed Wipe
This is a tale to lament the porcelain gleam. Now met its end by lumps of brown and green. Once …
Pure Pooetry
Undies in a Bunch
I’m perched on the porcelain, slumped in a hunch. Trying to poop but my undies are in a bunch. I …
Pure Pooetry
A Slam Dunk
With a loud resounding POOTOHEY… I violently fired a brown gooey. With such a high-speed rectal blast… In a speckled …
Pure Pooetry
Channeling The Shitstorm
The stars have aligned, my bowels are primed. Centuries have waited for this brown grime. Within me brews an epic …
Pure Pooetry
The Number of The Bog
Menacing fart clouds predict an ominous storm. An ancient evil prophecy is about to be born. Now I’m dropping a …
Pure Pooetry
Pure Pooetry
The Calm Before The Storm
This is the calm before the storm. Prior to the unsavoury being born. Everything is peaceful and quiet. One could …
Pure Pooetry
Rectal Resignation
I think my inspooration is drained. Bowels feel as if they’re sprained. I can’t come up with a single rhyme… …
Pure Pooetry
Compacted Stool
Here is a story about a stealthy brown attack. The battle took place within my own crack. I foolishly delayed …
Pure Pooetry
The Brown Age Mystery
Do you know poops are prehistoric? And no, that question is not rhetoric. Thought to exist in the ancient Brown …
Pure Pooetry
Microscopic Mineshaft
The butthole is like an old abandoned mine. Somewhere in there hides prized bronze grime. And in the mineshaft, shiz …
Pure Pooetry
A Frightening Discovery
Casually I lifted the lid and what did I find? Something that scared my naive behind. It was a colossal …
Pure Pooetry
On The Spot
I’m composing this on the spot. A pooem about my rectal snot. It blasts out with great ease. Pungent stench …
Pure Pooetry
