Brown Lantern
I’m sorry to bring you such terrible news. But I just delivered the most heinous of poos. The stench was …
Pure Pooetry
Winds of Northern Shartness
Once again it’s that time of the year… When I feel a chill against my rear. The porcelain is unforgiving …
Pure Pooetry
Onomato-poo-eia: Part 1
Pooping… hear the kerplop. Ass is burning and quite hot. Ahhhh, drop of cool water makes me hop. Clog the …
Pure Pooetry
Rectaliation
It is hereby my duty to uphold the sacred doodie. The ancient tradition of making brown smoothie. But also to …
Pure Pooetry
Chocolate Bar: Redux
Again I find myself in the parking lot. I feel a southern growth of choc-a-lot. An alarm goes off on …
Pure Pooetry
Iambic Buttameter
By myself quiet and content. Pushing out a stool that’s bent. In the porcelain, I’ve left a dent. A big …
Pure Pooetry
Microscopic Mineshaft
The butthole is like an old abandoned mine. Somewhere in there hides prized bronze grime. And in the mineshaft, shiz …
Pure Pooetry
Reluctant Artist
Here I am forming my creation. Substance like clay, a sculptor’s elation. However, this clay I will not be rollin’. …
Pure Pooetry
Volcanic Hazard
The throne shined white, whiter than snow… But soon that would change, it would lose its glow. Something was brewing …
Pure Pooetry
Brown Happenstance
Something in that milk tasted funny. Now there’s a rumbling in my tummy. A sudden urgency to locate the latrines. …
Pure Pooetry
I Didn’t Make it
Frantic running to a filled up stall. I gotta go now to answer the call. Doubling over in pain up …
Pure Pooetry
At This Moment
At this moment on the toilet, I sit. I grunt and I groan, having a shit fit. Finally the nugget …
Pure Pooetry
Classic Inspiration
Here I sit, my cheeks a parted. Tried to dump, but only farted. I decided to wait till it happens. …
Pure Pooetry
Porcelain Ruined
This once sparkling porcelain is in ruin. Because my butt did a sickly spewin’. I tried hard to hold it …
Pure Pooetry
The Evil Trio – Salsa, Milk, Beer
Playing a stinking tune with my rear. Not quite beautiful music to my ears. Spicy hot steamer bringing on tears. …
Pure Pooetry
Time To Bog
It’s time for a bog! What more can I say? I’ve been baking this one since yesterday! My stink biscuit …
Pure Pooetry
The Fecal Dungeon of Doom
Struggling with the girth of a ghastly behemoth. I pushed and pushed and began to screamoth. What was inside refused …
Pure Pooetry
Converted To Chum
As I sit and expel the sloshes of Hell. I detect a dreadful wafting smell. I swear I wasn’t eating …
Pure Pooetry
