Stand To Attention
Women complain we often miss.Yet I never felt Posideon’s Kiss. Cos I’m a dead shot, a winning bullseye. I’m a hole …
Pure Pooetry
Extruding The Noodle
In the land of the blind, one-eyed man is king. But in the bowl, only the brown eye will sing. So …
Pure Pooetry
Plunging To Death
I swear this plane just hit some rough turbulence… Just as I blasted away some lengthy flatulence. I’m miles above …
Pure Pooetry
Abandon Shit!
In my gut, there’s a churning of boiling hot lava. Fuelled by chilli, beans and several cups of java. This …
Pure Pooetry
A Meaty Brown Stew
This meaty brown stew, in the form of my poo. Its look and smell, sadly too well I knew. As …
Pure Pooetry
Brown Barnacle
The seas were angry my good friends. As a monstrous barnacle traversed the s-bends. This was no ordinary marine crustacean. …
Pure Pooetry
Runaway Boulder
It’s best to never tempt your fate. Especially regarding your stinky date. But I’ve just birthed a runaway boulder! It …
Pure Pooetry
Channeling The Shitstorm
The stars have aligned, my bowels are primed. Centuries have waited for this brown grime. Within me brews an epic …
Pure Pooetry
Pure Pooetry Rules!
We don’t care what the haters think. We write pooems and of course they stink! But amongst the rubble there’s …
Pure Pooetry
The Bog of a Million Riches
The Bog of a Million Riches… Has soiled countless britches. Due to lavish and extravagant lifestyle… And consumption of food …
Pure Pooetry
Doodoo Baking
I’m about to make a doodoo pie. Fresh and steaming from my brown eye. I lay some paper to contain …
Pure Pooetry
A Whale of a Time
The skies above are raining cats and dogs. But in my porcelain, it’s a storm of bogs. A wet one …
Pure Pooetry
The Apoocalypse is Near!
I have to ask, is there anything worse? Than incoming flood from the rear purse… You fumble to get your …
Pure Pooetry
Not a Moment Poo Soon
Move your ass! I gotta plant mine! My butt is about to flood the slime! This is an urgent, no-joke …
Pure Pooetry
Pure Pooetry
Chemical Warfare
I just popped off a stinky, from my rear pinky. Now to release the source with a brown eye winky. …
Pure Pooetry
Green, Amber, Red, BROWN!
Last night I ate something quite average. Now I feel an inner rumbling so savage. Going in, the taste was …
Pure Pooetry
Rear Reindeer Smear
It’s that time of season, it’s that time of year. When Santa’s reindeers leave a sickly smear. They fly in …
Pure Pooetry
