Move your ass! I gotta plant mine!
My butt is about to flood the slime!
This is an urgent, no-joke situation.
My brown eye is increasing in dilation!
I’ll do anything to avoid a pants crime.

Push past a colleague, they fall down flat.
I cannot stop else I’ll spill this scat!
The toilet is close I feel the onset of glee.
But still, there’s an obstacle standing before me.
The CEO wants to stop for a chit-chat.

I endure the nonsense verbal diarrhea.
I’m about to flood and yell “MAMA MIA!”
I won’t be able to make the porcelain throne.
So my ass takes refuge in the kitchen zone.
I just pooped in a co-worker’s tortilla.