Slow Brown Hurl
I’m taking the first dump at work for the new year. This one’s a slow release as it inches out …
Pure Pooetry
Commode To Joy
Wheres the joy in using public toilets? I find the whole experience to spoil it. You’re in a foreign world …
Pure Pooetry
Take The Plunge
This damn stubborn poop won’t take the dive. Of the brown the porcelain is deprived. An unloading, my bowel is …
Pure Pooetry
Doodoo Debt
I ask you, is there no greater issue… Than being without toilet tissue? When you’ve expelled the chocolate fudge… And …
Pure Pooetry
Happy Spew Rear
As we wish you a Happy Spew Rear… I release a fresh chocolate spear. It pierces the water with its …
Pure Pooetry
Scrubbing The Poop Deck
The funnel opens and the log departs. Soon there’ll be a brown blood bath. With a plop the mass descends. …
Pure Pooetry
Rectal Regret
Here’s something I deeply regret. My underpants are feeling wet. Soggy from the inside. And a stain I cannot hide. …
Pure Pooetry
The Seas of Doodoo Dread
Everyone’s angry cos I’ve been farting up a storm. Do I need to take a dump or is this just …
Pure Pooetry
Not a Moment Poo Soon
Move your ass! I gotta plant mine! My butt is about to flood the slime! This is an urgent, no-joke …
Pure Pooetry
A Few Specks of Brown
My once shiny porcelain is in a sorry state. When I last scrubbed? I don’t recall the date. I don’t …
Pure Pooetry
Chocolate Whip
Porcelain filled to the brim. All deposits into the swim. Actually, more like a drown. In the bowl nothing but …
Pure Pooetry
Brace For Impact
Clutch the seat and brace for impact. Too long has this stool been compact. And now it’s time to let …
Pure Pooetry
Scrub-a-Doo-Doo
Just now I used the toilet brush. I had to expunge a skid of mush. Left there by my own …
Pure Pooetry
Upset Stomach
Something has made my gut upset. A brown is brewing, I’m willing to bet! I’ll drink some Eno, then feel …
Pure Pooetry
Rectal Riptide Wreck
My poor erupting spleen was not too keen… For out of the blue came the brown and mean. It blasted …
Pure Pooetry
Aged To Poofection
This poop has been a long time in the making. For ages, my insides have been baking. And now it’s …
Pure Pooetry
The Pooper
You take a dump but I take one too. You fire your ass but I got runny poo. When you’re …
Pure Pooetry
One in The Oven
Something in my gut weighs a tonne. You could say I’m cooking a brown bun. But my internal oven is …
Pure Pooetry
