No Pain, No Poop
Here’s a story of the most heinous of shites. A mighty bog battle, the worst of all fights. I had …
Pure Pooetry
An Unpleasant Outing
I just had an unpleasant outing. Of some sickening sauerkrauting. Allow me take you back to the start. As usual it …
Pure Pooetry
The Royal Flush
King Shit rules from his porcelain throne. And I the lowly servant wipe his tailbone. Cleaning the royal dunnies are …
Pure Pooetry
The Horrible Mud Hog
I’m out on a stroll, walking my dog. Feeling pretty good, I have a little jog. The sun is out, …
Pure Pooetry
The Double Handed Wipe
This is a tale to lament the porcelain gleam. Now met its end by lumps of brown and green. Once …
Pure Pooetry
Settling The Doodoo Debt
I don’t mean to cause anyone to fret… But I’m here to settle a doodoo debt. I hadn’t visited the …
Pure Pooetry
Channeling The Shitstorm
The stars have aligned, my bowels are primed. Centuries have waited for this brown grime. Within me brews an epic …
Pure Pooetry
Turned To Darkness – Part I
Darkness fell upon the bowl… As The Wizard arrived to reap souls. He prays on the innocent who have no …
Pure Pooetry
A Sickening Sight
I peered into the bowl after a heinous outing. What I saw left my mind doubting. Was I responsible for …
Pure Pooetry
A Plumbing Mishap
Desperately I fled from my angry pursuers. Yet what I needed were the sewers. Somewhere, anywhere to unleash what lay …
Pure Pooetry
All Sick Senses: Redux
Around midnight I was awoken by a terrible sound. A grunting as someone laid a monstrous mound. At first I …
Pure Pooetry
Excrapvation
When you need to go in deep… To wipe out that heinous ex-meat. You consider using the ice cream scoop. …
Pure Pooetry
Ghastly Goop
The bowl is a void where no life exists. All that will inhabit, a swirly brown mist. So, behold the …
Pure Pooetry
Scrubbing The Poop Deck
The funnel opens and the log departs. Soon there’ll be a brown blood bath. With a plop the mass descends. …
Pure Pooetry
Brown Ravioli
Without warning and out of the blue. Came a gut feeling, too well I knew. Immediately I stopped what I …
Pure Pooetry
The Sinking of The Titanus
The High Seas waited for the ship to set sail… That of a monstrous turd the size of a whale. …
Pure Pooetry
Pooper’s Remorse
This terrible deed, I must confess. Laid by me, in a heinous mess. It sits glaring up from the porcelain …
Pure Pooetry
