Espresso Fartini
I hold aloft this classy brown drink. I foresee in my future a terrible stink. This robust espresso looks quite …
Pure Pooetry
Heavy Weight Title
Slowly I staggered away from the table… The weight in my gut made my legs unstable. I’d downed too much …
Pure Pooetry
Green, Amber, Red, BROWN!
Last night I ate something quite average. Now I feel an inner rumbling so savage. Going in, the taste was …
Pure Pooetry
The Yuleturd Log
It was Christmas eve and all was well. Except for my gut, it began to swell. I knew it was time, …
Pure Pooetry
Slurry in a Hurry
I gotta find some porcelain, I gotta find it fast. I’ve got a brown delivery and I fear it’s gonna …
Pure Pooetry
Down South
Way down south they have a special sauce. It can fill your undies with pooper’s remorse. Not for the tame, …
Pure Pooetry
Down in The Dumps
My friend I heard you were down in the dumps. I heard your poop was runny with lumps. So here …
Pure Pooetry
New Flavour
I sense a certain feeling, a sense of foreboding. Somewhere in my gut, something needs unloading. There’s a steamy stink …
Pure Pooetry
A Public Outing
Public toilets are not a nice place. Their conditions are a filthy disgrace. I hadn’t used one in quite a …
Pure Pooetry
Gurk at Sea
I just released a batch of soggy vile lumps. Enriched with a stink of heinous meaty clumps. The stench is …
Pure Pooetry
Friday Floods Once More
I just had an emergency evacuation. The fecal ejected before plantation. I found myself in a right shitty situation. Bowels …
Pure Pooetry
Maxed Out on Coffee
I’m on coffee number two and it’s only 10am. Something tells me I’ll be destroying the S-bend. The clock reaches …
Pure Pooetry
Crappy Crab Walk Cramps
I didn’t get the chance to poop at all yesterday. So I had a big load waiting in my brown …
Pure Pooetry
Half-Moon Crescent
Something terrible has happened in my bowel. I’m not sure how I can release something so foul. A sharp pain in …
Pure Pooetry
