I hold aloft this classy brown drink.
I foresee in my future a terrible stink.

This robust espresso looks quite shiny.
But I fear it’ll make my poop rather grimy.

Yet, it’s got the deliciousness of caffeine!
It’ll go right through me, then out my spleen!

The taste is bitter, not like a pineapple fritter.
Soon I’ll give birth to a creepy brown critter.

In fact, I just felt a sickening rear squelch.
Followed immediately by a backdoor belch.

Sooner or later it’ll blast it’s way through.
Down my tubes with all the other goo.

There was no olive, not a single floater.
And now my bowel roars just like a motor.

Poohaps my gut was shaken, not stirred.
It encouraged the growth of inner poop curd.

And when it lands into the porcelain bowl…
That rich coffee aroma will take control.

Now in completion of this Espresso Fartini…
I just rear tooted its gaseous stink genie!