I just had an emergency evacuation.
The fecal ejected before plantation.

I found myself in a right shitty situation.
Bowels weakened by excess of laxation.

That’s to say I ate far too many mints.
The laxative effect made my stomach wince.

My gut was violently twisting and turning.
For the porcelain I was dearly yearning.

I shuffled to the loo with such haste.
For I knew I had to ooze the sour paste.

But I couldn’t run nor stop the cheek clench.
The bathroom tiles would be brownly drenched.

I backed up to the bowl and lowered my pants.
Before seating the fecal erupted in advance.

But luckily I was inches from cheek to seat.
So the outpouring stream was not bittersweet.

The rush was intense and needed retelling.
Now I’m left with this brown river smelling.