Slowly I staggered away from the table…
The weight in my gut made my legs unstable.

I’d downed too much exotic food and drink.
Now what’s within will grotesquely stink.

I pray I can make it to the latrines.
Gotta unload the brown and greens.

With my legs arched like I’m straddling a bell…
I waddle to the toilet to unleash this Hell.

Gravity is against me, pulling at my guts.
I’m carrying the contents of a thousand butts.

An imaginary pendulum swings between my legs.
Like a phantom limb made of doodoo dregs.

The colossal might of this inner concrete mixture…
Is ready to blast outward like a poo-filled blister.

By some miracle, I made it to the loo.
Ten steps it took, now I can drop this goo.

I relax my sphincter and await the sound.
Instantly I hear the crashing of the mound.

Like a runaway wrecking ball, barreling into the bowl.
The porcelain was destroyed, never again to be whole.

Immeasurable is the weight of this gigantic dump.
Pulverised to bits are my pants and my rump.