A Fistful of Poop
I clench in my hand a fistful of poop. It’s a warm and soft mushy goop. The dog left me …
Pure Pooetry
Merry Shitmas!
Here’s a seasonal experience much too awful… I just pooped out a whole Christmas bauble! If it had cracked, I’d …
Pure Pooetry
Repugnant Rapunzel
An ungodly stink so fetid and sick… Hit my nostrils like a tonne of bricks. A blunt force trauma so …
Pure Pooetry
The Double Handed Wipe
This is a tale to lament the porcelain gleam. Now met its end by lumps of brown and green. Once …
Pure Pooetry
Settling The Doodoo Debt
I don’t mean to cause anyone to fret… But I’m here to settle a doodoo debt. I hadn’t visited the …
Pure Pooetry
Channeling The Shitstorm
The stars have aligned, my bowels are primed. Centuries have waited for this brown grime. Within me brews an epic …
Pure Pooetry
Angry Rear Crater
Last night’s meal was a meaty feast. Foolishly I had fueled an inner beast. By morning my southern regions were …
Pure Pooetry
A Stench Did Creep
In the dead of night, I was awoken from sleep. I detected a stench that stealthily did creep. It worked …
Pure Pooetry
An Awful Hatching
You’d better start the fan and light a match. Cos something awful from my rear did hatch. Hanging in the …
Pure Pooetry
Can’t Wipe Lefty
As much as I try, and try as I might… I can only ever wipe with my right. A lefty …
Pure Pooetry
Better Not Slip
Last night’s burger was delicious and nice. But this morning my rectum is paying the price. My gut felt normal, …
Pure Pooetry
Pure Pooetry
Rectal Regret
Here’s something I deeply regret. My underpants are feeling wet. Soggy from the inside. And a stain I cannot hide. …
Pure Pooetry
Brown Lantern
I’m sorry to bring you such terrible news. But I just delivered the most heinous of poos. The stench was …
Pure Pooetry
Vicious and Violent
Two iced coffees and I’m about to down a third. Soon the onset of a vicious and violent turd. But …
Pure Pooetry
Mushy Morsel
The stench was so foul, I nearly fainted. The person before me, the porcelain they painted. Shades brown, black and …
Pure Pooetry
