I was minding my business one cold winter morn.
When all of a sudden my butt gave a terrible yawn.

Concerned at the noise that my butt did make.
I ran to the loo and not a moment too late.

But what did I find when I got to to the loo?
All stalls were busy I had nowhere to poo!

I thought to myself “whatever shall I do?”
I needed to find a place quick to go number two.

But then it dawned on me in this emergency.
I fled to my car to release this brown insurgency.

Much to my horror, I got to my car with little time left.
Only to find someone attempting a car theft!

I thought “screw it!” and jumped in beside the perp.
Just as I released a horrible anal burp.

The thief did panic and put his foot on the gas.
The sudden movement released the spawning from my ass.

Moments later and the car had come to a halt.
The thief had passed out from the fumes, the silly dolt.

Sitting beside the unconscious thief I waited for the browns to stop…
And wondered how I will explain this to the cops!