Shizhard Wizard The Meatiest Shit
Leaving me now is last night’s dinner. It was a spectacular feast, a real winner. Cooked to perfection, a meaty …
Pure Pooetry
Poo Ohm Bomb
I am the Zen master of taking dumps. Each nugget splashes in with a thump. I centre my being and …
Pure Pooetry
Avalanche of Brown
A build up of gas brews deep inside. I must quickly vent it from my hide. I take the throne …
Pure Pooetry
Prayer to The God of Poo
Oh stinky brown god, hear my poo-prayer. Long into the toilet bowl do I stare. My doodoo-devotion is only for …
Pure Pooetry
Layers of Filth
In the bowl lies a stinky slurry. Made from yesterday’s rancid curry. But before then it was murky meat pie. …
Pure Pooetry
Service With a Smile
The guy who delivered our TV. Said he needed a toilet to pee. But after he’d used our loo. It …
Pure Pooetry
Pure Pooetry
Simple Wiping Advice
Here’s some simple wiping advice. Don’t use the same toilet paper twice. Once the white has touched the brown. Quickly …
Pure Pooetry
An Ancient Brown Power
After a burger of epic proportions. I had to commit a stinky abortion. And in the bowl lay a foul …
Pure Pooetry
Heinous Smearing
Out came a rancid brown slaw. And with it a stink I deplore. This afternoon’s expelling of sour mash… Was …
Pure Pooetry
The Brown Sweats: Part III
I’ve got The Brown Sweats. This morning, in my duvets. Then again at breakfast time. Dacks filled with brown slime. …
Pure Pooetry
Stroppy Ploppy
I’m feeling angry. I’m enduring a bit of rage. So I make a fist and empty my poo cage. But …
Pure Pooetry
Danger Spill Plopinson!
I need somewhere to drop this load. Somewhere like my own abode. But I’m miles away in a foreign land. …
Pure Pooetry
Short Sunday Rhyme
Here’s a short, shitty Sunday rhyme. And of course it’s about the brown slime. Foolishly I had too much dairy. …
Pure Pooetry
We Ain’t Stoppin’
Just cos the book is out, we ain’t stoppin’. Check it now, our fecal is still a-ploppin’. CANNOT STOP. WILL …
Pure Pooetry
Constipation of The Nation
I’m suffering from some constipation. My face is redder than a fire station. I’ve been here far too long… And …
Pure Pooetry
Trent The Crazy Fisherman
I know a weird guy named Trent. His shit comes out all bent. Although he tries to straighten it out. …
Pure Pooetry
Rough Times
The toilet paper at work is terribly course. After using it my anus feels pooper’s remorse. There was a time …
Pure Pooetry