What you and I don’t need.
Is we shouldn’t have to plead.
With a stubborn rear end.
Driving you around the S-bend.
Hogging your mass with greed.

And it certainly shouldn’t hurt.
When you’re giving a lil squirt.
But if you see a bit of blood.
Amongst your freshly laid mud.
It’s time inspect your butt dirt.

It should flow with great ease.
As if lubricated with grease.
You want a long brown snake.
To make a swirly chocolate cake.
Anything else is a nasty tease.

So if you’re having a violent fit.
And your anus won’t release the shit.
Don’t heave till you burst a vessel.
You cannot win this fecal wrestle.
You just need to sit tight for a bit.

This tip might sound a bit mental.
You should eat more greens like lentil.
But my accountant advised to me.
A great way to set the scheiße free.
You can work it out with a pencil.