There’s just no time to get more paper.
I’ll risk what’s there to clean this caper.

It’s cold and raining so I downed some caffeine.
And almost instantly my deuce grew mean.

A ferocious thump was felt from deep within.
The expression on my face went to frown from grin.

To the throne I went using leaps and bounds.
The time was ticking to release this mound.

I opened the door to see minimal paper.
But the pain of the deuce was far greater.

My pants dropped down and my ass got planted.
The deuce erupted but now I was stranded.

The paper ran out and I was down to the roll.
So I tore it apart and continued wiping my hole.