My ass is too big for the seat in this stall.
Both my flabby cheeks spill over it all.
Precariously I balance upon this slimy seat.
My sweat has made this a difficult feat.
While I attempt to maintain a centred position…
I blast out the junk food that created this condition.
But I used too much force to the left of my rump.
And I slowly tip over, me and my weighty lump.
I try to fend off gravity by clutching at the wall.
But my hefty mass has quickened this fall.
I’m at a dangerous point, my cheek is nearly free.
Then the seat edge will shoot up the crack of me!
I quickly blast a grease torpedo from the right cheek.
It gives me the balancing push from this seat so sleek.
I’m centred again, back to my pooping duties.
And then out blasts a mammoth rocket doodie.