Yet another day, yet another poo.
I sit in contemplation, squeezing out number two.

The last chunk leaves my bowel.
I look to my left and release a desperate howl.

The toilet paper levels are seriously low.
How could I be so careless, what a blow!

It’s times like these you need a miracle.
I wish this was a joke, merely satirical.

I carefully peel away the last scraps of paper.
This comes an end to this brown caper.

I notice the glue at the end of the roll.
I’m sure this is safe to go down the bowl.

But what about my soft peachy hole?
Keep the glue away, that is my goal.

I could go into toxic shock, or worse!
I don’t need an infection in my meat purse.

Tactfully I make do with what I have been given.
When my undies get washed I hope I’ll be forgiven!