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Magic, Pooetry

Conjuring The Caca

With a wave of my wand and a puff on my pipe.
I cast this spell, much like performing a wipe.

I hold aloft the spellbook made from toilet paper.
My bent wizard’s nose inhales a dirty vapour.

It doesn’t smell quite right, this stink is a bit off.
I can taste it now and it makes me cough.

Poohaps I meant to read the spell on the next page…
I may have accidentally released evil from it’s cage.

This twisting vapour suddenly becomes awake.
It quickly transforms into a greasy brown snake.

My aeons old nostril hairs tingle at the vile scent.
This antique evil fart-snake is filled with malcontent.

I mutter a counter-spell and the snake is banished.
And just like that, in a brown dust cloud it vanished.

With my wrinkly eyelids closed, I chant more magic words.
From my crusty wizard butt I’m ready to unload turds.

I’m safe now that evil has been vanquished from the room.
And a dunny appears beneath me not a moment too soon!

Pure Pooetry

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