Of all the food sources that fuel our disgusting shit.
There’s one above all that is the pooiest hit.
It’s meat. That full bodied and hefty fleshy mass.
It makes us poop the most solids, and yes, it’s crass.
There’s beef, chicken, pork and delicious glazed ham.
Best when fresh and not served like spam in a can.
There’s also turkey, lamb, venison and wild boar.
But there’s one that makes our shit really soar…
It’s bacon! That magical cured slice of delicious meat.
It helps us produce the most stinkiest of fecal feats.
Whenever in doubt of your own poo’s greatness…
Look to the bacon for that dumping so heinous.
Look to the light, the spiritual b(e)acon of hope.
Bacon is my religion, I’m the bacon-fueled pope!
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