On its way was a deuce of mammoth proportions…
So I knew had to exercise extreme caution.

With a violent push I grew with fear.
I had to get to the throne but it wasn’t near.

I fastened my pace, I’m not taking a chance…
If I moved too slow I’d probably shit my pants.

I arrived and sat and began to brace.
This monstrous deuce would definitely desecrate.

And the rest my friends is fecal history!
How I’ve survived is quite the mystery.