Yo Ho Poo

Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.
I’m sitting here with a thumb up me bum.

I’m quite drunk and constipated you see.
If only the brown would flow like my pee.

My poo is stuck fast and not an inch will it budge.
And now my thumb is sinking into the brown sludge.

Drank too much rum now my poo is all gooey.
Anymore of this and I’m going to be quite spewy.

If only the spew would come out of my brown hole.
Please poo, out my murky passages you could stroll.

Even a tidal wave of brown would suit me fine.
Give back my thumb and no longer I’ll whine.

Butt alas my thumb is pulling inward, this I’d feared.
It’s like it has a life of it’s own, a possessed rear.

Now my hand is swallowed, this is messed up!
Not unlike those two girls and their brown cup.

Oh shit, I’ve now lost up to my elbow!
I guess this is the shitty seeds you sow.

I feel my arm and shoulder disappearing into a brown void.
My poor yet hungry rectum is now being destroyed.

The pain is unbearable from my arm and anus.
This is brown hell, my fiery ring is heinous.

I scream and wake in a sweaty terror.
I see the bed sheets are brown, my shitty error.

Pure Pooetry

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