This coffee has put me in quite a stew.
Now I need to unleash a rectal spew.

Or maybe it was the sugary Froot Loops.
Either way I feel the onslaught of poops.

But upon taking the porcelain throne.
I hit a snag and hear a trumpeting tone.

BRRT BRRT BRRT! Goes my butt flaps.
Sputtering out only a few brown scraps.

But nothing solid, no lumps of disgust.
It’s as if there’s a hold up, it’s all a bust.

Then my bowels grumble and lets out a whine.
And I can feel it inside, there’s plenty of slime.

So what’s going on? Where’s the rectal spew?
I’m only seeing brown pebbles, and just a few.

I grunt and groan, giving it one last thrust.
But all that comes out is a cloud of brown dust.