Shitty Slip n Slide

Race down on the Shitty Slip n Slide.
Go for a sloppy, brown ride.
You’ve go no cheeks to hide,
Cos you’ll be on your behind.

Brown skiddin’ with the wind in your hair.
Leavin’ a trail of mud without a care.
Those behind inhale the rancid air.
That’s if they go skiddin’, do they dare?

Baked beans gives you the extra boost.
Look back at the power it’s produced.
A trail of tiny nuggets, brownly juiced.
A lubricant for the next, you’ve introduced.

You race to the end of the poo fun.
Red raw and brown is your bum.
Good thing you had the runs.
You shat it out like bullets from a gun.

“Fecal victory!” you cry, claiming first place.
The losers glare at you with disgrace.
But no evidence of their poopy chase?
Oops, the kids playground you brownly defaced.

Pure Pooetry

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