I have a problem, I’m the first to admit this.
I’m hooked on chillis that boil the south abyss.
I need to back off, say no to the spicy powders.
Cos later on I’ll feel the heated caca-chowders.
I lie to myself "this will be ok, this will be alright."
But my rectum is suffering an evil spicy shite.
I glance in the bowl and see waters so murky.
A bit of red, brown and green like gurky.
No doubt from all the volatile food I’ve consumed.
Like a spicy brown cement, my fate is doodoo-doomed.
And there it is, the pangs of searing hot shite.
Burning my a-hole as I try to give it flight.
I won’t be able to walk for the next few days.
Cos my bunghole is crispier than a fiery blaze.