Oh my fricken good glaven!
My butthole is really misbehavin’.

The reason for this deuce that’s mean.
Today I drank too much caffeine.

I probably drank more than a litre.
The path of destruction is over a metre.

Exploding gas and spicy drizzle.
One might say it’s a sausage sizzle.

In my stomach, there’s no relief.
No doubt it’s the chud that lies beneath.

Now I’m done and I’m going to bed.
When I wiped the paper was red.